Are you not feeling fulfilled by your dream career? Is it time to pivot? Brian Patacca is a former actor turned acting coach who is no stranger to pivoting. While Brian excelled at booking countless TV roles and commercials, he found his true calling was coaching other actors.
In this episode, Brian shares his early life as a young teen, how he navigated success in Hollywood, and how he came to pursue his true passion of helping others.
Listen now to learn Brian’s tips for overcoming fear, and how you can succeed in the career of your dreams!
Ina Coveney
Today we have the absolute pleasure of talking to Brian.
Brian Patacca
Hi, Ina! Hi! I'm so thankful to be here. This is so exciting.
Ina Coveney
Oh, I am so glad that you're here. Before we get started, why don't you tell everybody what you do right now and who you help?
Brian Patacca
Great. The majority of my audience is actors, and I’m not an acting teacher. I help actors with the business side of acting, which—just so everyone who's listening who is a coach knows—is almost exactly the same. They have to keep putting themselves out there over and over again. Sometimes they get success, and sometimes they don’t. A smaller portion of my audience is writers, and then an even smaller part of my audience is coaches. A lot of these actors and writers, of course, are finding their survival or hustle job in offering services through online spaces. So, I also coach them in that space, using the success of my own business as a guide because people will often see my business and say, "I like what that looks like. I want my business to look like that." That’s very hands-on. Most of my programs are online in large groups.
Ina Coveney
Well, I can’t wait to dive into how you got there because I’ve been doing some studying. But I just want to go back for a moment. Why don’t you tell everybody—where were you born, and what were your childhood days like?
Brian Patacca
Sure. I grew up in Cleveland, Ohio, in a single-parent family. My parents got divorced when I was pretty young. I have a younger brother who is seven years my junior, so I was the older brother trying to be the man of the house. My mom was working full time. I wouldn’t say we were homeless, but we definitely experienced housing insecurity. We’d live in one apartment and then wonder if we could afford it before moving again.
That kind of instability instilled in me this belief to not add problems to the pot. I needed to be a good student and walk toward my strengths because there was already enough going on at home. My mom was incredible—she always provided for us and taught me that anything was possible. She even put me in Montessori school when I was little, which I think was brilliant. She gave me this sense that I could achieve whatever I wanted, even when resources were tight.
Ina Coveney
It sounds like your mom was an incredible influence. But growing up in Ohio, which you mentioned wasn’t particularly welcoming to queer people at the time, must have been challenging. What was that like for you?
Brian Patacca
Yeah, Ohio wasn’t the most welcoming place for someone who was a bit different. This was before Will & Grace was on TV and not long after the AIDS crisis. “Gay” wasn’t cool or even something people talked about. I didn’t even have the words for what I was feeling because I didn’t have any gay role models around me. I just knew I felt different.
I was a good student, though, so my teachers liked me, and that gave me some safety. But my friends and classmates were merciless at times, making fun of me in the hallways. Honestly, I think I blocked out a lot of it. High school was tough. I went to a huge school—2,700 students—and there was hardly any diversity. I didn’t feel safe being different, and no one else did either. It wasn’t until I got to Northwestern University in Chicago that I realized, "Oh, I’m gay." By the third day of college, I just knew.
My mom was incredibly gracious when I told her. She had always been supportive. Being gay isn’t my entire identity, but it’s a part of who I am. Getting to college and seeing so many diverse people—Jewish people, people from Saudi Arabia, and all these different walks of life—was life-changing. It felt like, “Being different is okay.”
Ina Coveney
It sounds like your formative years were really about trying to fit in without even realizing what belonging felt like. Do you remember any specific stories from that time that helped shape who you are today?
Brian Patacca
There are a couple of little moments that stand out. One is when I was probably in kindergarten. My mom asked me, "What makes you the happiest?" She told me I got quiet for a moment and then said, "Starting something and finishing it." That sense of follow-through has stuck with me my whole life.
My mom also gave me this foundational belief that everyone is special, and no one is special at the same time. It wasn’t spiritual, but it was grounded in the idea that we’re all here to do the best we can. That belief let me blossom in my own way, even when people called me names on the school bus. I didn’t even know what “faggot” meant at the time, but I knew there wasn’t anything inherently wrong with me. My mom’s confidence in me kept me grounded.
Ina Coveney
Your mom sounds like a phenomenal woman. What was her name?
Brian Patacca
Doreen. She was amazing.
Ina Coveney
She really does sound incredible. As a mom myself, I hope my kids talk about me the way you talk about her. But I want to complete the picture here. What were some of the hard times that shaped you during those years?
Brian Patacca
Well, my parents were divorced, so I’d visit my dad in Philadelphia while living in Cleveland. My brother and I would fly to see him during holidays or summer vacations. It felt normal to us because that’s just how life was. But now, as I reflect on it, I realize how disjointed it was.
My dad was doing his best, but our visits often involved fixing up his house or spending time on his sailboat. It felt strange to be helping make a home with my dad when my mom and I didn’t have a stable home ourselves. My dad passed away when I was 28, and looking back, I think I missed out on having the kind of relationship with him that I wish I’d had.
Ina Coveney
Thank you for sharing that. It really paints a fuller picture. Besides your mom, was there another adult influence in your life who shaped your path toward acting or coaching?
Brian Patacca
Definitely. My fourth-grade teacher, Mrs. Pepe, was a huge fan of mine. That was a tough year for me because we were living in a crummy apartment, and I’d just moved schools. She really took me under her wing and made me feel seen.
Another big influence came from a theater production that visited our school. It was this Sesame Street-like performance about feelings, and it just lit something inside me. I’d never seen storytelling like that before.
In high school, my English teacher, Mrs. Geisler, also stood out. She created this safe space in her classroom where being smart was celebrated, and that really stuck with me. Those moments and mentors planted the seeds for both my acting and coaching paths.
Ina Coveney
It’s incredible how those moments and mentors shaped you. So, let’s fast-forward a bit. You mentioned earlier that acting was your primary focus, but coaching started to creep in. How did that transition begin?
Brian Patacca
It all started while I was in a show called The Donkey Show, which was this disco retelling of A Midsummer Night's Dream. It was set in a nightclub styled like Studio 54, and I performed six shows a week. It was my first big gig, and I was thrilled to be working. But I was also the only cast member with a second job. Everyone else seemed to survive on the show’s paycheck, but my Midwestern work ethic wouldn’t let me do that—I was temping during the day and auditioning whenever I could.
While I was in the show, I started noticing my fellow actors struggling. They’d talk about how they couldn’t get an agent or weren’t booking auditions, even though they were incredibly talented. It just didn’t make sense to me. So, I started helping them. I’d sit backstage between shows and say, “Okay, here’s what you’re going to do with your headshots. Here’s how you’re going to approach agents.” And lo and behold, they’d come back and say, “I got an audition!” or “I booked something!” That’s when I realized I had a knack for coaching. It was so fulfilling to help them and see the immediate results.
Ina Coveney
Wow, that’s amazing. So, was that the moment you realized coaching could be more than just a side gig?
Brian Patacca
Not quite. It was more of a gradual realization. At that point, coaching was just something I did naturally—it wasn’t a business yet. But then I read a book called Acting as a Business by Brian O’Neil, and it totally shifted my perspective. It helped me see acting not just as an art form but as a business. I started applying that mindset to my own career and to the people I was helping.
Eventually, word spread outside of the cast, and more actors started seeking me out for guidance. That’s when I thought, “Okay, maybe this could be something more.” But it wasn’t until I was on the set of The Newsroom on HBO that everything changed.
Ina Coveney
Oh, you’ve got to tell us about that moment!
Brian Patacca
So, I had this great little role on The Newsroom. It was the kind of gig most actors I was coaching would dream of. I was on set with Aaron Sorkin and Alan Poul, and it was such a cool experience. But the entire time, I couldn’t stop thinking about my coaching clients. I had to cancel three client sessions to be there, and I even moved some others around for my costume fitting.
While I was on set, I remember thinking, “This is fun, but… it’s not as fun as coaching.” That was the moment. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I finished the job, went home, and talked to a friend who’s also a coach. She asked, “What if you just gave up acting for two weeks?” I clutched my pearls and said, “Absolutely not!” But she encouraged me to try it, so I did.
Those two weeks turned into two months, then four months. Before I knew it, I was fully leaning into coaching, and acting just fell by the wayside. I realized coaching gave me so much more joy and fulfillment than acting ever did.
Ina Coveney
That’s such a powerful story. But how did you make the leap to coaching online? That’s a whole different ballgame.
Brian Patacca
It was a mix of necessity and opportunity. At first, I was doing small, in-person accountability groups in New York and later in Los Angeles. We’d meet weekly, and I’d guide them through building their careers. Then I started working with a coach myself, and she helped me see that I could scale what I was doing by creating online courses.
My first course was all about fixing actors’ casting profiles. It’s like LinkedIn for actors—it’s how they get auditions. I noticed so many actors were neglecting their profiles, so I created a step-by-step program to help them optimize it. It was my first attempt at teaching online, and it was a learning curve, but it worked.
I remember the first day of my launch—I made $9,000. I was floored. That moment showed me I could translate my energy and skills from live settings into the online world without losing the essence of who I am.
Ina Coveney
That’s incredible! What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about you as a successful business owner?
Brian Patacca
Oh, I am 100% responsible for this misconception, but people think everything is shiny, perfect, and thriving all the time. They see the wins and the polished exterior, but they don’t see the hard work, the setbacks, and the struggles behind the scenes. For example, this year has been incredibly tough because of the WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes. It affected my clients, my business, and my team.
I’ve been trying to share more of the behind-the-scenes struggles, but I also don’t want to center myself during a time when actors are struggling to find work. It’s a delicate balance. I want to be a source of hope and joy for my community, not a reminder of the challenges.
Ina Coveney
That vulnerability is so refreshing. Before we wrap up, I want to ask: If everyone listening had to do one thing in the next 24 hours, what would it be?
Brian Patacca
Email someone. Right now. Think of one person who could use your help, and send them an email. The email can be simple: “Hey, I was thinking about you. I’m helping people with
XYZ, and I’d love the chance to help you. Is this something you’d be open to talking about?”
Quit overthinking it. The person who just came to your mind? That’s the person. Write to them. Even if they don’t become a client, you’ll learn something valuable from the process. Action beats analysis every time.
Ina Coveney
Brian, this has been such a lovely conversation. I feel like I could talk to you for hours! We need to do a part two where we dive deeper into strategy.
Brian Patacca
I’m ready whenever you are. Let’s make it happen!
Ina Coveney
Perfect. In the meantime, where can people find you and connect with you?
Brian Patacca
You can find me on Instagram at @briansaysthat. If you scroll down far enough, you might find some shirtless pictures from my acting days, but stay at the top for the new stuff!
Also, I have a free resource I’d love to share. It’s called “How to Say Thank You Without Being Weird.” It comes with an audio training and a guide to help you express gratitude in a meaningful way. You can grab it at brianbreakscharacter.com/74. And, of course, check out my podcast, Brian Breaks Character.
Ina Coveney
Thank you so much, Brian. This has been incredible. I’m holding you to that part two!
Brian Patacca
You got it. Thank you so much, Ina!
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